Girls, there's a deep nervousness involved in sitting next to a boy you like. You think about holding his hand and you wonder if he thinks about holding yours. It's this crazy butterfly feeling that threatens to tear you apart from inside but at the same time is magically exhilarating. Your stomach does cartwheels every other second; the feeling is nearly addictive. Your eyes dart to from his face to his hand when he's not looking. You wonder if he would pull his hand away if you went for it... but you have a feeling that he wouldn't.
There's so much emotion in a moment like that.
You decide to go for it, and he embraces your hand in an awkward way that says he's been thinking about making the same move and he's glad you did.
Chills run through your body and suddenly you are very aware of every twitch your hand makes, every subtle squeeze he makes to affirm you in this vulnerable moment.
I love this feeling--the adventure of going out on a limb I'm not sure is capable of holding me from falling off and hitting all the branches on my way down. It is wonderful to seize a moment that has every potential to go drastically wrong. It's probably like going skydiving the moment before you pull the cord for the parachute. "This is so awesome!! and I, uh, really hope the parachute works." I don't know for sure, I've never been skydiving, but 'm fairly certain those thoughts would be at the top of my brain as gravity pulled me past the clouds and back down to earth.
Risk is grand. I think God designed us all for adventure... even in hand holding.
Someone calls you out in the middle of your awkward nervousness, "Are you holding hands?"
Your face reddens and you're sure that your hand just got disgustingly sweaty or something. You feel like a spotlight is on your intertwined hands in the middle of a desert. Incredibly exposed. But you still don't want to let go, because every anxious moment is worth it.
"Nope," you reply and grin.
